um

i like 8asians.com. however, i dont like that they have to resort to these shitty ass supporters in order to subsidize their site. WTF

eww

need i say more pt. 2

the only asian man featured on the manhunt welcoming page has his back turned. all other models are photographed full-frontal, with jock-straps. please, don't "you're imagining all of this" to me.

check out how fucked up this is

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asian_fetish

fuck you jake

ugh where do i start...
so there was this guy.

i met him two summers ago, that crazy summer where juliana had a crisis and stayed in san francisco for a while, and i worked at naia and ended up doing lots of drugs and going buck wild.
his name is jake b. he was an industrial design student at cca in potrero hill, the school where my dad was offered a job to teach. i thought he was the coolest guy. i only met him once that summer, and we hung out at his house and watched movies in bed together. what really got me about him was that he we were the same kind of weird. you know how there are a lot of different kinds of weird? well he was my kind of weird. quirky. he liked punk rock too, and had all these cool books and gadgets and crap that i would totally buy at a garage sale if id had the chance or seen it first.
anyways, when i chilled with him that day, we took a nap together. he was so cute to me, a little older, but like half-bear half just whatever. he liked to go fishing at tahoe and told me about doing shrooms and sucking on a lime for hours because thats the type of shit you do when you're fucked up. i thought it was an endearing story. we ended up getting pizza at goat hill and then coffee, and i told him i wanted to see him again soon.

i remember after that day i hung out with aundy and her dad. we were going to some storage space to grab some shit for their house, and the whole ride there i just couldn't stop talking about him. i just felt like we clicked, and i was just really excited that there was some other dude out there who was like me- or like me enough that i liked him a lot. plus, i thought he was hot, and remember thinking, why the fuck would this dude want to have anything to do with me? i guess i was that enamored.

i remember it was a week before i had to go back to school. for some reason i told aundy's dad of all people that i didn't even wanna go back to school. i just wanted to move in with this dude id just met and never go back to that fucked up college again. of course, he talked me out of it, which wasn't too hard because im not that impulsive anyway.

the next summer i came back home and called jake. he told me he couldnt hang out because he was in a relationship with some girl. i was kinda bummed, but decided whatever, that i guess it was good what we had and that i should just move on.

this summer, he contacts me and we start talking again. he said he wanted to hang out, and i was game.

so i got to see him today. i was kinda nervous about going, but i really wanted to. he showed up in a cab outside his house, i guess he didnt wanna keep me waiting. we watched this movie called moon, where this guy who's consigned to monitor resource-gathering equipment in space for three years only eats beans and has a machine friend kinda like HAL on 2001 space odddysy, goes apeshit and sees naked girls everywhere, and finds out there are hella clones of himself up there incubating. it was weird.

so we fucked around, and took a nap. then we got vietnamese food, which was bomb. there, he talked to me about relatinoships. turns out, the girl he dated was a tranny, and he just got all bitter all of the sudden. he told me he's been in hella relatinoships, but basically when it came down to commitment time, he ran away. i could see that i guess. at one point he said, "im 32 and still havent figured out this shit. i just need someone who likes assholes. if theres someone who likes a grumpy old fuck, then id be like, hey! thats me!" i didnt know what to say to that, i just thought that yeah, basically you're telling me that we cant be in a relatinoship, which isn't really what i was looking for anyway. but i didnt think he was an asshole. i liked him. at least, i did then.

so after that we went to his neighborhood bar called "parkside." it was pretty empty. but there was a photobooth there, and i asked him if he wanted to take a picture. so we did, and when they came out, he took one look at them and went: "you look like an immigrant"

i was so shocked that all i could muster was a "thats fucked up." all he said was "yup," and that was that. the rest of the time, he just chatted up the bartender and some CCA student, and i just sat there, staring at the football game, thinking about how lame he was. i cant believe i didn't say anything to that- i just felt so paralyzed, and almost even guilty for thinking that way, as if i were overreacting or something, which is definitely dangerous territory. like kathleen h says, whatever you feel is alright alright alright alright. i should've never second guessed myself.

so he hugged me good bye and just peaced out. on the bus, i just felt so numb. i cant believe i thought he was a cool dude. and not even just that, i thought he was the coolest dude ever. and then he just pulled this racist bullshit out od his ass like it was nothing. like i was nothing. im disappointed in myself for actually having faith in this guy.

after that i just ended up chainsmoking cigarettes and shaking my head on the corner of market and church, while all of these white people walked by totally oblivious. i felt so silent and insignificant. i shouldve fucking said something. but the words were just lodged in my throat, ready to leap, but just... didn't.

he totally was an asshole. i totally realized why the fuck this dude wanted anything to do with me. because he's a fucking asshole. i thought about how many relationships he's been in, or at least he's said he's been in, and thought wow. people are shallow as fuck. they probably only dated him because he's hot. and he was the one to break it off. its hard to swallow the fact that this asshole is gonna get more ass than me because of his looks. not even his personality. he might even be rewarded for his assholeness with more ass. what the fuck dude.

im so fucking done with these loser fucktards

cool/uncool 6AM discoveries

tell me why these ads exist.



and why i didnt send this response.





according to a survey im smarter than 89% of the US general pop. what the fuck dude









happy holidays from the UN, bronxville chapter













and this wasn't totally laughable, but i laughed anyway

THE FUCK ME NEW YEARZ

this was probably the most fucked up new years ever. at least according to three sources who happen to be really close to me. maybe it was the economy? the fact that there was a blue moon that night? whatever it was, hella crazy shit went down.

so, story one:



1. Pewee, Chita, Rev and Yen

They went to the Zion-I show down at club6. yen got hella drunk and started puking everywhere, so the crew had to take her home via rev's mom, who should be driving in at any minute. so they were beginning to cart yen away when pewee fell behind. thats when the pig came. he snatched pewee by the arm and asked her "what business do you have with these girls?" referring to chita and alex, who were white. she said, "they're my FRIENDS, im trying to catch up to them."

THEN the cop pushed her against the wall, an impact from which she bears a dime-sized bruise as of around 3pm today. the cop started patting her down and asked her if she's been drinking, and pewee said, YEAH BUT EVERYONE HAS. (IT WAS FUCKING NEW YEARS). the cop asked her, "do you know what i can ticket you for right now?" Pewee said, "NO, ACTUALLY, WHAT CAN YOU TICKET ME FOR RIGHT NOW?" For there was absolutely nothing she was doing wrong at the moment of her seizure. then the cop said, "ARE YOU GETTING SASSY WITH ME?" and asked for ID. Pewee said, "NO, THATS MY GIRLFRIEND AND MY FRIENDS, CAN YOU PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE?"

So i guess the cop eventually realized how fucked up he was being and left her alone. And what sucks is that Peweee didn't have the chance to copy down his badge number or ANYTHING. it totally reminds me of when i got handled like that in high school.

ANYWAYS,



2. Bree and Senny

They were on BART into the city and flashing their party favors around when this girl starts muggin them. so bree says, "you need to stop hating and get to where we are," and before she knows it, the girl's screaming at her and pulling her hair, and bree socks her in the face. all of bree's friends jump in and in a second, the fighting halts, and they back off of each other.

then some stupid ass street performer hella racialized his audience, which is just wonderful.


3. me

bree called me circa 3 and i was having chest pains. i had to go to the ER where i stayed until around 7 or 8AM getting, EKGs, x-rays, and had a needle sticking out of my arm for a couple hours. HAPPY 2010 YALL